Firstly, im sorry to be posting this here, but im just feeling down for no reason, so just dont mind me. when i got the msg from you, saying you feel that we werent close like before anyway, that you feel awkward, i felt so useless @ that moment. i dont know why, and i dont know when, i started becoming very emotional.. i can cry over small things, and do stuff i never did before. i can breakdown infront of my family, first, there's school life, secondary school life reeks i say. its really so suckish. no one i can truly trust. no one i can believe in. not even my teachers or close buds. there's bytochs like ******, try'na bring me down, how? by badmouthing me, making people hate me and all. its seriously sucks. i dont wanna care, but how not to? how can i not care when im lossing everything?! how can i not care when people are misunderstanding me? I really dont know what to do anymore. my confidence, self esteem, all effing gone. gone for good eh? im really sick and tired of everything. first dreads going to school, unattentive in class, whats the point of studying with no interest or attentiveness? its just bullshit i'll say. effing bullshit.. then after school, either home or CCa, netball, doesnt really sucks, but when its too much fitness training, and too little court game, it really sucks luh. forget bou netball. home, isnt home suppose to be filled with warmth and love, well, its not for me, this 'home' is so !$%&^% .. seriously, everytime i reached home, i'll just hide myself in my room.. i dont wanna face my family, i dont know how to face them.. either they ruined my day or i'll just screw it myself. sighhh.. forget it uh... things just seems so sucish today.. fcuk lah..